Stop the Shaming

Maneatingrose 2

This Sunday I was jumped on twice in a camper group for posting pictures of our new tent. We were sent a used, returned, broken tent with missing pieces.  $429 for crap.

I was lectured about being angry, not being understanding of the seller, not being nice. It was one woman. I don’t know why, but women are often the ones doing the shaming of other women.

I grew up in an extended family of Southern women who repeatedly told me complaining wasn’t ladylike. That I should try to get along with people better. That I embarrassed myself.

My mother was told that too, even when my father beat her. Relatives were so afraid the neighbors would find out, or the church. One even told Mom she’d made her own bed, then she had to lay in it. Nauseating.

Women have the right to stand up for themselves, to complain about bad service, to not be on the receiving end of stupid advice.

I used to be an online merchant. I sold miniatures to Columbia Pictures, Disney Theatrical, to people from Idaho to New Zealand. At one time I was even the editor of a consumer group’s newsletter in New Orleans. I know how customer service works.

I didn’t argue with the numbskull who took me to task but blocked her. I called the supplier and told them what I expected from them. A new tent’s supposedly being expressed.

That’s not being a bitch; that’s showing I have the stones to be a grown up.

Sisters, stop shaming other women when they don’t conform to outdated stereotypes. We can be feminine as hell, be strong and stand up for ourselves. You don’t have to like us to be respectful.


One Comment on “Stop the Shaming

  1. Amen! You have every right to express your feelings. Especially if you didn’t get what you pay for. People expect us women to sit back and take what is dished. It’s time to stand for ourselves. I can’t blame you for blocking. I just blocked a family member for calling me names on my wall.

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Ramona DeFelice Long

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